I hate reality so much at the moment. I think taking the pill is making me a little depressed but at the same time it’s just intensifying the thoughts and feelings I already have to a point where I cant even think let alone speak or do anything to do with my real life in this body that i have and this house and this course and i don’t even want to list these things because reality is so so so so so so so so so so so boring and i hope i find the strength inside to finish this semester. I don’t know if quitting my job was the right thing anymore its probably just feeding my detachment from life. it’s pretty outside. I should go for a walk to clear my head…if that’s possible.